So let me guess, you went on a date and it did not work out AGAIN right? Finding the right companion for yourself and a person that sticks around, can surely seem like it’s draining you of your own energy. It is hard not to feel rejected and it is even harder to not feel victimised. However, let me give you a few tips that will enrich your single life and give you some insight on how you should be dating.
- You are good enough– It is not about someone thinking your good enough. It is not a contest. How another person perceives you shouldn’t affect the way you view yourself. I know it is easier said then done because you’re probably thinking, ‘if I was good enough’ then why doesn’t he or she like me? However, NOT everything is about you. What you may find high on your compatibility list doesn’t necessarily match up to what is high on theirs. You deserve to be with someone whose list is similar to yours.
- First dates are NOT meetings for marriage– That fast train thinking of yours that gets so excited about the first date needs to stop in its tracks, IMMEDIATELY. JUST because that cute guy is going on a date with you doesn’t mean that he is MARRIAGE potential. Raise your standards and know that you really have to get to know someone before your mind travels to Narnia. Marriage is not a joke, so stop treating it like one.
- Damaged goods– If a man tells you he’s damaged goods, not the relationship kind and not into monogamy, BELIEVE HIM! DON’T and I REPEAT DON’T, try to change him. After a few dates if you are getting this involved in someone that is already telling you that they are not going to match your efforts then GET OUT! Yeah, if you stay you might be able to change his mind somewhere down the line because you know that ONE friend it happened to. But, there are plenty fish in the sea, which will see how amazing you are and connect with you from day one. So why invest in someone that is already telling you they’re not worth your time?
- Just an opinion– When you take him out with your friends for the first time do NOT make the mistake of deciding how you feel about him based on their opinion. Your closest friends are your entourage. They are the people that care about you the most. They know your past and have been there through the struggles, so it is only natural that their opinion is going to be biased. However, no one will know you LIKE YOU! And, unfortunately our friends don’t know what ‘ticks’ for us in a relationship. Take their opinions and keep it at the back of your mind. If something is worth giving a chance, you owe it to yourself to find out.
Dating has truly become like going shopping for shoes. Although colorful and filled with plenty of options to choose from, finding the right pair takes time.
So give it time and go shopping.
Remember, only when you see what your options are do you then get clarity on what’s right for you!