Most of us thought that by the time we got to our late twenties, dating would become a whole different ball game. It would be easier, free of obsessive analyzing, free of drama and we would all share common future goals. If you are in your late twenties and reading this right now, you are probably rolling your eyes.
What people forgot to tell us years ago is, that it actually gets worse. Everything is intensified even before a relationship begins, because now we think long term and about our future. However, the word long term seems next to impossible when dealing with most 20-something guys. Here is a look at why women are rethinking dating this specific age group:
Not settled: Most men in their late twenties are not settled in their careers. This is an understandable reason as to why they might not be able to give you the level of commitment you want. According to most men, guys will always want to be the caretakers and as long as they haven’t achieved their goals, they won’t want to commit. Committing to you at this point will make them somewhere feel like they can’t provide for you thus making them feel, not good enough for you. But here’s the part we question. You asked them to DATE you, not MARRY YOU. Most women in their late twenties are also figuring their careers out. We want a guy that will be consistent, reliable and has the potential to possibly grow with us. We are NOT looking for someone to marry, over night. Surprisingly enough, we also want to take it slow.
Not ready: I think I’ve mentioned before that this one is a personal favorite. What does ‘I am just not ready’ even mean? Were you ready to walk? Go to college? Get a job? This is one sentence women across the globe simply can’t fathom. Men will give up on great girls, say they’re ‘not ready’ to her and their friends, and presume that we all should just, understand. Guess what? No one understands you when you say this to them! We should all know by now that meeting someone in your late twenties, whom you are attracted to and whose company you also enjoy, is RARE! If you think you have met someone great, please GET ready. Letting something amazing go just because you were too afraid to try, will only leave you with something ordinary when you are. DON’T take your luck for granted.
Unsure of what ‘the one’ even is– No one is sure. Not even women. None of us are going to walk into a room one day, meet someone and be like ‘AHA, that’s the one’. However, most men in their late twenties have no idea of what type of women they wish to settle down with. By having no idea, they might even sabotage an existing relationship. As I mentioned, this is a confusing phase for most people as we are all thinking long term. However, there are certain things that men and women at this age already know they want in a partner. Why can’t we just go with that and our gut?
Sexual Experiences– I guess most women at this age find this the hardest to understand. Haven’t we all had enough? Didn’t they get this experience in what was known as the ‘horny teenager’ phase? Or the ‘experimenting in college’ phase? Or are women to presume, that men don’t change with time, only their phases do? Women at this age wonder how some men can have so many frivolous encounters and not feel empty? Wouldn’t it be more fun to have one amazing person to share this with on a regular basis?
I guess at this stage in life, women and men of this age group may want different things. Women have reached the point where their attitude is more ‘been there, done that, now where is the real thing’? Some Men on the other hand, are not done. Perhaps it is because they are still figuring their lives out and can’t make this a priority right now. Unfortunately, you can’t hate them for that either. Dealing with men like this, means that their path is just different to yours. However, I will add that there are men in their late twenties that do have things figured out and are very open to serious relationships and romance. In fact, to them, it is one of their MAIN priorities.
Although these are some of the reasons as to why women are thinking of dating older men right now, perhaps it’s not about age, or connections, or goals, or even phases. Maybe, it is just not that complicated and the answer is really simple.
What if, all it is really about, is meeting the right person, at the right place, and most importantly…
at the right time?
Previously Published on Yahvi News.