Being cheated on is by far the worst feeling. Someone you trusted with your heart, your fears and allowed yourself to be vulnerable with, completely let you down. They caused a massive crack in the foundation that held your bond together. And, although right now it may seem that you can never get over this, I am here to tell you that you can. So, how do you deal with being cheated on?
It wasn’t your fault– For starters; accept that this wasn’t your fault. Accept, that there was NO way you could have seen this coming. This was a choice they made AND unfortunately, it had nothing to do with you, because if it did they wouldn’t have cheated in the first place. There is nothing lacking or missing in you as a person. In fact, it only really speaks volumes about what is missing in their character, morals and values. So don’t make this about you. This one is all on THEM!
Don’t get even– This one is harder said then done. TRUST ME! However, getting even will only be seen as you dropping to their level. And quite frankly, it won’t make the pain any better. Causing them pain won’t make them understand the level of pain they have caused you neither will it take back what they did. So there is actually no point in this one as you don’t need to drop in your own eyes to teach someone else a lesson.
Don’t lose hope- This may seem difficult right now but sometimes people let you down so that you can learn what kind of people you want to keep around in your life. In a twisted way it’s like the universe is trying to take out the bad eggs from your world so you don’t put more faith in the wrong people and waste your time. It might actually be a blessing in disguise. Don’t lose hope. Remember, there are people out there that would never do this to you. And, although this person used to fall in that box, and it is painful, understand that people make mistakes. You will meet people in the future that wouldn’t risk destroying your entire relationship.
Forgive them– I know you can’t believe I am asking you to do this but as I said, people make mistakes. Sometimes we have to forgive people for getting lost, not having the same moral compass as us and for making bad choices. Think of something in your life that you never thought you would do, and then the day came that you did it. You probably learnt from that lesson. It’s probably a lot of the reason of why you are who you are today. Unfortunately, this might be their turning point.
Will you stay or go? This is the part where I or anyone else can’t give you any advice. It is completely up to you if you wish to give this person a second chance. When the unexpected happens, some of the damages last forever and some teach you about what matters most in the world. If you can truly forgive and move on from what they did as well as trust them again, then perhaps you can stay and rebuild this together. If you are someone that will never be able to forget, don’t waste any of his or her time, especially yours.
It is completely in your hands to deal with your pain and move on from when someone doesn’t treat you the way you expected. Completely heartbreaking, but not impossible. You can try and go back and pick up the pieces OR you can accept the heart break, understand that although your dreams seem shattered right now, new dreams and people that wouldn’t do this to you, will come. All you have to do is pick yourself up and keep looking ahead. The choice to go back or move forward is completely up to you.
However, if there is anything I have learnt in my life,
you can’t really play on broken strings.