5 Signs that he already has a girlfriend!
When it comes to dating, time and again, I watch people loose their eyesight. We want to believe that the relationship is truly making us happy, so we ignore all the signs that tell us otherwise. If staying in miserable relationships has become our generation’s new trend, then what are some of us doing to ensure happiness is brought into our life? Unfortunately, an equally popular trend is cheating. You could be the girl that sheds happiness in his life for a few hours, till he goes back to the unhappy relationship he can’t seem to get out of. Either way, you become the other woman because he is taken!
It isn’t your fault and you won’t see it coming. I would like to introduce you to a concept created by yours truly. This concept is called ‘the Casanova blindfold”. He will charm you and make you think he is available for dating; yet he will have ample reasons as to why he can’t date you right now. You are blindfolded by the mystery and attention without realizing that you are simply falling prey to the average Casanova. So, what are the signs that can help you notice if you are becoming a victim to this very concept? Take a look:
Unanswered phone calls: Does he answer his phone when you randomly call him to say hi? If a guy liked you and had nothing to hide, it doesn’t matter if he’s out at 5 am dancing on a bar, he is going to want to answer that call. Or, he is at least going to get off that bar eventually, see your missed call and be excited to call you back. When you are alone with him, does his phone go unanswered many a time? Silencing calls or going in another room to answer a call are also red flags to pay attention to. I understand that everyone likes a bit of privacy. However, privacy and suspicious behaviour are two separate things. Just because you like him, doesn’t mean you have to trust him completely. Trust is earned, remember that.
Restricted timings: Are your meetings during a specific time slot? If you call him randomly to hang out when it is convenient for you, are you always shot down? If he is only free at a certain time then that is surely odd behaviour. If you feel that the meetings are only restricted to HIS convenience, then perhaps so is your very existence in his life. For more information on dating patterns check out Are you dating or hooking up?
House visits: Does he take you out? Have you met any of his friends or family members? Does he always want to order in and ‘Netflix and chill’? Don’t get me wrong. It is extremely fun to ‘Netflix and chill’. However, every girl deserves to put on a pretty dress, red lipstick and to be taken out. But, whenever you attempt to do so, the following excuses are used. “ I am exhausted from work, I just want to spend time with you alone, why do we need to go out?” You may think it is endearing and sweet that he wants to spend so much time with you alone. However, did you ever stop to wonder that perhaps all he is really doing, is hiding your relationship from the world?
Doesn’t spend the night: Ah! We all love spending the night with someone we are getting intimate with. Yet, for some reason, the person you are seeing never wants to sleep over. He may stay late, but not the night. Again, the excuses may seem valid but have you ever considered that perhaps he is answerable to someone else? Maybe, you are not the only person in his life. Could it be possible that there is someone sitting at home, waiting for him, who is also getting valid and believable excuses?
If he’s going to be out of touch for a while: This one is truly my favourite. I mean where is he going? Unless he is in a forest, somewhere in the middle of nowhere, why is he telling you that he is going to be out of touch for a while? As a generation, our cell phones tend to be treated like our lifeline. So, the second someone tells you this, your suspicion should rise immediately. Perhaps the truth is that he doesn’t want you to call. He doesn’t want your number or texts showing up on his phone and most importantly, he wants to NOT keep in touch. ALL of these are red flags and should make you wonder, why create this distance if I am the only person in your life?
It Is NOT Your Fault!
The ‘Casanova blindfold’ can happen to anyone. In a generation where true monogamy happens rarely, it is easy to fall prey to such situations. However, I am here to tell you that it is not your fault. Do not get scarred by such experiences. Yes, someone may have fooled you for a while but at least you have the courage to try and build something with someone. This has nothing to do with you. It is that very courage that is going to make you find what you are looking for. Look at it as a blessing that you found out earlier, rather then later.
The point is to trust people, but not blindly. Let them earn that place in your heart. You deserve to be with a person that will want to invest in you and not keep you in the dark. For more information on this, check out The Power Within- #TakingYourPowerBack
At the end of the day, you can only trust your self completely. So, trust that whatever the situation, whatever the rollercoaster, whatever the drama, you will get out stronger than ever.
And once you trust that, all you have to do, is untie the tightly tied blindfold, put on that red lipstick…
and keep on walking ahead.
If you are looking for advice on love and dating you can Direct Message me on Instagram or write to me on Ask For Advice