Most of us start our year with an element of hope. We hope to make peace with the mistakes of the year that just passed, we hope that we get a step closer to our dreams and we hope that this year, will be better than the last. Some of us tend to look back and examine why some of our relationships fell apart and why some of us can’t seem to attract the type of bond that we wish to hold on to. We spent the holidays, content with our family and friends but our eyes did wander in the direction of the couples around us who were lucky enough to share this connection. We are only human, so it is only natural that we stopped and asked ourselves, “why don’t I have that?”
So this year, let’s make a list of goals that will help us attract the type of relationships that we want and let’s stay true to it. Treat it like a resolution list if you must, but mostly treat it like a list that will help you to keep soaring ahead, through whatever curve ball may be thrown your way.
I will never settle for less than I deserve– We all know the type of connection that will help us grow individually as well as, as a couple. However, time and again, we let our heart pave the way to a course that reality eventually destroys. I believe that sometimes destruction is necessary. Every heartbreak makes you ten times stronger. If you do not know what it is like to loose in love, then you also don’t really know what it is like to win. You can never really avoid this paradox, but maybe this year you can allow yourself to try and only open up your heart to someone worthy of it. Let your heart lead but not at the expense of lowering your standards and getting nothing in return.
I will love my self– Although, a repeated concept by yours truly, it is the most important one. In order to not settle you must love yourself completely. You should know what you deserve at all times. You should be comfortable with your own company and know that what you are willing to give in a relationship should match up to what someone is willing to give you. You shouldn’t need the other person. You should want them. The only person you truly need, is YOU.
I will not look back– As the saying goes “would you really look through yesterday’s garbage to make tonight’s meal?’ I know that this is easier said then done. However painful, we have to keep in mind that there are reasons things don’t work out. And you can spend and waste more time trying to figure out that one reason you may never find, or, you can just take a deep breath, look ahead, and wait for what’s next.
Reflect– Reflect on your past relationships. They teach you a lot about yourself and about what doesn’t work for you. The next time you date, remember those things. It is easy to attract similar cycles into your life, if you don’t learn from what went wrong. Keep those factors in mind and don’t drag out things if they pay any resemblance to what doesn’t suit you. Set your standards higher and don’t be afraid you won’t find what you seek. The higher your standards are, the higher the chance of you coming somewhere close.
It’s important we make these goals and look at them from time to time because life can make you hit roadblocks when you least expect them. It is okay, if you make mistakes, if you forget or if you simply and blindly, just… fall in love.
However, it is most important that you learn from everything. That you don’t make the same mistakes and that you stay true to your path and what you want from life. Maybe if we focus more on what we want and less on relationships where we give more and receive less, we may actually have a shot at attracting someone worthy of us.
So starting today, let go of it all. 2016, taught you things that you will hold on to forever because what ever they were, they made you strong. That hope you hold on to every year, cherish it, because it keeps you alive.
And maybe if you focus on what you want all year round, with a sprinkle of aspiration garnished perfectly on top…
you might actually attract a relationship that is tailor- made to not only what you deserve,
but for what you truly yearn.