I recently watched a movie about a guy getting the opportunity to magically see his entire life as he travels through time. And, although a lot of films have been made like this, it has always been a fascinating concept to me. If we could go back and change things in our past, would we be who we are today? If we can see what our future would be like, could we change some of our decisions today? If time travel were a possible concept, would any of us live in the present?
When it comes to relationships I find that when people are happy and content they live in fear of what the future may bring. When people are single, they view their wonderful God given freedom, as being alone. They wonder whom the future will bring, or, thanks to romantic comedies, secretly hope that person in their past they hold a torch for, will miraculously realize they can’t live without them. With all this fear and fantasizing, are we ever really living in the NOW?
If you are in a relationship and it is going well, why add so much pressure that can in turn, destroy a good thing? We ask so many questions like, where is this going? Is his job good enough? Will he propose? Will she be faithful in the future? Is she truly ‘wifey’ material? We forget to stop and to remember to breathe. We forget to look around us and see other single people struggle so hard through a dating pool that brings on possible heartbreak and complete anxiety. You are already with someone that loves you and wants to be with you. Your foundation is already set. Let the person live their life and keep their identity that they have earned. All you have to do is aid in their growth today and stand by them. If you can do that for each other, before you know it, the future will be here. And, the decisions that you thought you had to fret about, will be easier to make, because it will just feel like a natural step. And, isn’t that worth waiting for?
If you are single, how much can you possibly worry and complain? Dating, has become a hard concept and we all get it. Finding someone you are not only interested in, but are compatible with and are at the same stage in their lives where both your goals are similar, honestly, feels next to impossible. But it is not. There are tons of people out there who are exactly where you are today. Stop picturing the white picket fence and the golden boy that’s going to come save you one day. Live for today. You never know who is right around the corner. You never know who is going to teach you something new about yourself, make you discover a new colour to life and most importantly, who is going to make you fall in love.
The point is, we don’t allow ourselves to be happy as we live in fear of what the future may bring. We hold on to the past for comfort and thus forget the beauty in today.
Someone refreshingly interesting recently painted an image for me that brought my attention to the following questions. In return, I am going to do the same for you.
Imagine your car pulling up to a traffic signal on an empty road. You look to the left and you lock eyes with the perfect stranger. When the sign turns colour, do you take a U- turn that will allow you to re examine your past and search for the answers you seek, chapter by chapter?
Do you go straight, knowing that there is someone out there, who might mirror what you are going through in your life, without expecting anything, into the oblivion of the unknown?
I guess the real question and the one that gets me the most is, no matter which decision you make, what gear will you decide to cruise on?
So tell me fellow readers,
If this was your car, your situation, and your traffic light…
What happens when it turns green?